I Have No Use For Most Group Activities

I Loathe Them.

When I was younger, I liked group things. As I've grown in adulthood I avoid group activities whenever at all possible. I can't stand group things. There is always a group of people at work who do things together after work, these things mostly involve alcohol and are often the topic of discussion the next day at work. Everyone laughs and tells inside jokes, it's all fun.

These same groupie people will often put up invites for anyone to come and join the fun. The same people always go. I never do. I must sound like I'm not that fun to be around. In truth, if getting drunk and kissing someone else's wife is what it takes for me to be considered fun, then I am decidedly not a fun person. I don't drink alcohol in large doses, I don't like being the butt of a prank or joke, and I would rather spend time with my family at home.

It is not just the gross alcohol consumption that keeps me away. There are barbeques, movie nights, and so on that I also decline as gracefully as possible. There is just one reason for this, I hate groups. I distrust groups. I've seen how a group can target people and ostracize them. I have been the recipient of such.

When I started my job I was part of a large group of people who were hired at the same time. I am the last woman standing from the group. All of them have left to other things. I miss not one of them. A couple of girls, I won't call them women they behaved too much like teen age girls, took a pretty instant dislike to me for whatever reason. One was particularly brutal, and hateful towards me insulting me whenever the opportunity presented itself.

It was a particularly difficult time for me. I had been away from my field for a while, and was struggling to perform at the best of my ability. I was feeling quite insecure, I was not confident in myself at all, and it showed. This vulture sensed my weakness and picked at my eyeballs every chance she got. As I grew tired of her treatment, I decided to take it to management, I figured I was not the only person feeling that way, and that she had no right to make the work environment so unpleasant.

They dealt with her after that. She knocked the crap off, and I got on with my work in peace. Of course her little friends had to make their comments here and there, but I found that if I looked them straight in the eye and said, "What did you just say?" They were reluctant to repeat themselves. Eventually it all passed, and they left. I was glad to see them go. They eventually turned on each other as it was, and the group split right in half. It turned out to be the boys against girls. None of it affected me, I wasn't part of the group anyway.

I carried on and forged relationships with people on my own. I much prefer to deal with people on an individual level. I have friendly relationships with many of the people I work with. I don't socialize with any of them outside of work. Every once in a while I talk to one of them on the phone, but for the most part I go to work, have a decent time, then go home. I prefer it this way.

Every year our boss has a BBQ at her house, I actually told her the truth, that I probably wouldn't come because I hate group activities. She was very understanding, and said that it was perfectly fine with her. There are plenty of people who will go, who love that stuff.

The last time I went to a group dinner with co-workers was when we were overseas. One of the women I worked with was going away, so there was a dinner at one of the restaurants off base for her. My co-worker/good friend talked me into going to this thing. I ended up walking out, and dragging her along with me. The husband of the woman who was going away and his friend were really drunk and sitting across from my friend and I. They said some very cruel things about the two of us, I guess they thought in their inebriated states that we could not hear them. I did hear them.

I told my friend, I'm leaving, are you coming? She wanted to know why, I said I will tell you later. She was Japanese and I knew it would take some time to explain to her what they were saying. She didn't ask anymore questions, I guess she trusted I would not rudely leave without a good reason. Before we left, I walked around the table and leaned over and said to the husbands of my co-workers, "You two are a couple of assholes!" I said it as loudly as I could possibly say it, hoping to embarrass them. Then we left.

Outside, I explained to her what these two knuckleheads were saying, believe me it was nasty, I'll just say it involved lesbianism, and it was most disrespectful. I think if my husband were there he would have smashed that guy's face with his boot. My friend's husband upon hearing the story was very glad that I did what I did. Marines know you just don't talk about people's wives like that. These guys were Air Force, maybe there are different standards. In any event, no man with any decent upbringing would talk like that at such an occasion.

The fall out at work on Monday was pretty dreadful, I had a hard time dealing with either of them after that. Both women came to apologize, I told them something akin to "your husband is a complete jerk, needs to grow up, and lacks proper home training, but I accept your apology. Let's just move on." That was as graceful as I could be about it. It wasn't their fault, but I wanted them to know so they could relay that message to their husbands.

Everyone moved on. I came away knowing that those sorts of events are just not for me. I still avoid group gatherings of other than family and/or friends if at all possible. Life is too short.

Back From The Salt Pits

It Is Not That Bad I Guess.

Busy week at work. I took on a few extra hours this week so I was all tied up. This looks like it is setting up to be another boring post about me, which means it's not worth plagiarizing at all, so my friend will be disappointed. I will try to come up with something eventually. She told me she doesn't like the stuff about me, it doesn't make sense when she posts it on her blog. Hey, I'm just glad she bothers to read this stuff. It is a good friend that will read one's blog regularly.

My sister doesn't even read my blog. She says she can't remember the address. I said, why don't you just bookmark it in your favorites, she said, "I already have a favorite, and that is QVC." I see. She did give me some lovely snowflake earrings she bought on QVC, so I couldn't really complain. She brought them out and I adored them, and being the sweet sister she is, she immediately gave them to me. Then she pulled out her laptop and ordered another pair for herself. I think she may be addicted to home shopping. She won't even know I said that about her because she doesn't read my blog.

I don't know if my husband reads my blog, he doesn't usually say so if he does. I think he might read it because every once in a while he will come to bed laughing about something on my blog. It doesn't happen all that often, but it makes me feel good when he does. I love his laugh. It is even better when he snuggles up to me and snickers in my ear. God he is wonderful. I don't want him to leave tomorrow, but he has to. I pray for his safety, and comfort in the rugged weather of Wyoming.

It is almost time for bed. I'm pooped. Who isn't after a long day in the salt pits? Actually, I shouldn't make such comparisons, my job is quite cushy in reality. Oh yes, I work, work hard, but the environment is nothing like a salt mine. Nothing at all.

Good Night.

Off To The Races

Or Something.

I'm tied up with all sorts of stuff right now. Nothing bad, just life in action. I probably won't be able to post for the next few days or so. Working some extra hours this week. The good news is, I finished my class on Tuesday night, and I'm getting an "A". Have a wonderful weekend.

Today

Monday, December 4th.

I can't shake this feeling that I am supposed to be doing something today, but I don't know what it is. I went to bed last night trying to remember if I had some sort of committment that I had forgotten, or if I had an appointment, or what? I just can't think of anything I had planned for today other than catching up on homework and studying for my last test.

What is it? Gosh, I hope I'm not forgetting something important. Woe is me.

Can You Believe

What A Sweet Baby.

It is difficult to believe that dogs of this breed are so reviled. People always ask me what breed my dogs are and I happily tell them, Pit Bull Mixes. We don't know what our little girl here is mixed with, but I don't think she is full Pit. I've wondered if she might be mixed with Boxer, or even Shar Pei because of her wrinkly skin, but we don't know, and I suppose we never will.

It doesn't matter. She has a very sweet temperament, and has been an all around angel since we got her. Only bad thing I could say is she is a total bedhog, and hasn't figured out her place at the bottom of the bed. It has been a bit tough on her, as you can see she's good at making puppy eyes, all right, it's really tough on me I admit it. She's just so darn cute though, and just such a gem.

Spoiled Rotten. The whole lot of them.

Keeping On

The Drought.

Major dry spell for me lately. It has actually been going on for quite some time, I just keep putting stuff up so that I can hopefully get over the hump and find the words to say things again. That is how we get to the point where all I post about is the minor details of my daily life which I don't think is all that interesting to anyone at all.

My class is almost over so I'll have a little break until school starts again next year. I'm planning on taking more classes next time. I'm debating whether to take 3 or 4 classes. I don't want to get in over my head, but I would like to be finished or near finished before the start of the next decade. The next decade people! Goodness. That seems so far away, yet just around the corner.

I feel pretty driven right now about school, and I don't want to lose that momentum. At the same time I realize I have other commitments and responsibilities I must take care of. My work seems quite cooperative with me about things which makes me feel extremely happy about my job. I've been really happy at work lately, we've been having a lot of good laughs, it has been good. Like most things it is what you make of it. I could easily dig up some junk to complain about, but I have decided that I am not going to focus on the negative.

The good things are, I love my co-workers, I'm treated nicely, and with respect by my bosses. I make decent amount of money for the hours I work, so all in all I have nothing to complain about. This job is going to help me get through school. I don't have to leave the place I'm working either, I could just transfer at some point. I'm just thankful for things the way they are.

My husband has been very supportive of me going to school. I just have to decide what classes to take next semester. I have those dark moments where I doubt myself, and wonder, am I wasting time and money going to school at this point in my life. Maybe I should just throw myself into my work and try to move up, but going back to college was something I've wanted to do for years now, and I'm going to do it without regard to what reward may or may not come with that effort. Besides the only promotion that I could get at my job now would be into management, and I don't think that's how I want to spend my days at work.

I just need to hang in there and not ask "why?" so much. The "why" will get you in trouble sometimes. I don't know why, I just want to. Is that good enough? I've laid my arguments out, I've reasoned through them. I've tried to make a decision based on that. I've tried not to predict the future, only the possibilities. There is a good possibility my body won't last another 10 years at the level of use I'm currently at, nor do I wish to continue on indefinetly using it in this manner.

Throwing my back out this summer was enough to jump start me into action. I don't want to keep relying on it this way. I've got brains too, it is time to use them more. That's my goal. Anyway, we will see what comes of it all.

Cheeseburgers, Chex Mix, And My Neat Freak Friend

Plagiarize This.

That plagiarize part is an inside joke between my friend and I. She's one of my loyal readers, and she likes to plagiarize my posts and put them on her myspace account. Oh my gosh, she's going to kill me for putting that. Actually, I gave her my full permission to put whatever she wants of mine on her space account. She will keel me for telling that she has myspace, trust me she has real reasons for it and she's not just hanging out on there for no reason at all. I'm in so much trouble at this point I might as well not bother to stop.

I went to get my friend and her two kids today and we had a good time. I'm happy to report that my house is sparkling clean, and that my friend, the one I just pissed off royally in the paragraph above, basically cleaned it from top to bottom. Yeah, yeah, I helped too, but she wizzed through what would have taken me all day, because she is much more organized and a better cleaner than I am. I was put to work in the kitchen making Chex Mix.

You see that's what happens when two hungry fat women go to the store to pick up something to make for dinner. We even laughed as we walked into the store, she asked if I've seen that show about two fat ladies cooking, I said, "Yes, I think it's called Two Fat Ladies Cooking." We got an idea as we walked through the store, "Hey, let's make Chex Mix!!" We were just going to get some hamburger, and buns to make cheeseburgers. I wanted to get some stuff and make cole slaw, or something to go with it, but she thought we could just eat Chex Mix with it.

There we stood in the chip aisle, and I looked her dead in the face and asked, "Are you serious? Chex Mix with Cheeseburgers?" She just shrugged. She really wanted that Chex Mix. I said, "Well, I at least want some chips with it, what kind of chips do you want?" She said she didn't really care, she thought we didn't need anything to go with it besides the Chex Mix, oh yeah, and she mentioned the jar of olives that I insisted we pick up.

"Umm, Cheeseburgers and just olives?" I asked. She thought that would be fine. Finally I said, "that's it, I'm getting some Doritos then." So I did.

When we got back from the store we ran around picking up the house for a while, and then I got to work on the Chex Mix, and she said, "The girls and I are going to go downstairs and clean up, it will only take a minute, you stay and work on the Chex Mix." I thought that a bit odd, so I said, "I'll come help, just give me a minute." She didn't want me to do that, she said, "no, we got it, just stay up here."

All right. I did as instructed. She was in pure Peppermint Patty mode, so I knew to obey. Sir get's really angry when she is not obeyed. Well, sneaky thing, I figured out why later. Those sneaky turds brought my daughter's toybox down into the family room, to it's new home. Basically, my friend thought since there were so many of her toys down there, putting a toy box down there was the next logical step.

She tried to comfort me by telling me, "Hey, it won't be much longer until she doesn't want to play with toys in the living room anymore." I reluctantly agreed. Besides, I didn't want to lug the thing back upstairs anyway. It is a family room afterall, and those are generally for the entire family, so we will leave it for now. Besides she is a total authority on cleaning, so maybe it will help the mess situation in my house, the only idea I have for keeping a spic and span house is for us to move out.

After the Chex Mix finished, I started making the cheeseburgers, we ate dinner in the very clean house, and then sat on the couch for an hour before I took them home. The roads were really nasty, but we made it all right. Thanks to my dear friend, my house is all perty again. It was a really nice day for us all.

What Does One Do?

Snowed In.

Why it takes a snowstorm, the schools closing down, and pretty much having no where particular to go as a result of it, to get me to clean the house is beyond me. I guess no one wants to really be trapped inside with their own messes including me!

Did I mention that I love snow? I most certainly do. Something about the quiet that comes with a snowstorm is so comforting. Ever notice how the snow seems to stifle all other noise? It's so deeply relaxing. I love how the heater sounds when it pops on.

Waking up to everything covered with snow is so wonderful. Snow is beautiful too. I love the crunch of snow under my shoes when I go out in it. I don't particularly like shovelling the stuff though. I'd rather not if given a choice.

Well, I'm not really trapped inside, I could venture out in the snow if I wanted to. I've been hearing reports of cars sliding in to curbs and ditches all morning. Curbs and ditches people! I think that's probably enough of an incentive to stay in if at all possible. I do realize that many people have 9-5 grinds they must get to, and no I don't feel particularly sorry for them. These are the same people I serve every weekend, and holiday. I don't feel sorry for myself either, I realize that those are the days I must work to have my job. I agreed to that. There's no sense in complaining about it now.

It has just been my good fortune today that the snow came on a day that I did not have to leave the house if I did not choose to. It could have easily came on Saturday, but it didn't. So I'm just going to enjoy the solitude, and home time. School was cancelled, so the kid is around making messes and doing her usual. Perhaps I will attempt to channel that energy of hers into a productive activity like sorting clothes for the laundry, or vaccuuming much neglected carpets.

Who am I kidding? I did get her to take the trash out, but that was just because she wanted to get out in the snow. Here she comes now. She wants me to warm up the car and take her somewhere. Something about picking up her friend. My mom has already called me asking if I was going out, if I would pick her up some milk, she's out of milk and has decided she needs milk today, now.

I think that's the end of that. Perhaps I will have to venture out, but if I do go get her friend, they're going to be cleaning house with me. I mean it.

Safe and Sound

Whew.

Hubby got to his destination safe and sound. He called me at 1:30a.m. to let me know. I was glad to hear it. I worry when he travels. Yesterday the weather was going to be quite nasty for him, and indeed it was he said. He drove slowly and made his way to the rig in one piece. Once there, he slept in his car until this morning when he officially started his week.

I could tell he didn't particularly want to leave yesterday afternoon. I think it was hard for both of us. We did a lot of bonding when we could, but I worked so much over the holiday weekend I think I was just too pooped to be very fun to be around.

Next week will be better for us. I'll be off more, and won't be so tired after work. It seems if we don't have enough time together we have a difficult time parting ways when the time comes. Some people ask, "isn't it hard being apart so much." Well, of course, but in truth, we actually spend much more time together when he is home than we did when he was here working his 9-5 grind.

How can that be? Well, before he always had weekends off, I never had weekends off, so unless one of us requested a certain day off, we never or rarely had even one whole day off together. We did that for well over a year before he changed jobs. Now, the first couple of days he is home, I'm on my days off, so we have more time alone, especially when our kiddo is at school. We can talk, go out to lunch, do shopping, whatever we want. I'm sure any married couple with kids can think of many things to do when the kids are at school.

That time means more to me than a whole week of hit or miss and spending a few hours together in the evening when we both are exhausted, and never having any time together for the most part. So, it works for us most of the time. Sometimes we'd like a little more time before he has to head out, but we know in just a week we'll be together again.

The biggest downside of the whole thing is I worry so much about him when he is gone. Is he warm? Is the weather all right? Is he doing all right? But then, I worry that I worry too much, I'm pretty much just a worry wart. Worry is a weird word isn't it?

Be back later.

Post Post Thanksgiving Post

Let It Go Already.

I am. Really, but I couldn't think of anything else to say. Horrible to admit that I'm sure. Well, hub left today. I hate when he leaves. I choked back tears when we said good bye this afternoon. Some weeks it is just harder to do. I pray he has a safe trip, and week. Always.

He got a new car while he was home. The thing is awful pretty. Very comfy, and cost about the same as mine. It's a Jeep, so I'm hoping it will carry him to and from safely despite the poor mileage the thing gets. One thing is for sure, it's got just about every gadget and gizmo under the sun in it. Did you know that some cars have built in things you can program your garage door opener into? My gosh, I had no idea that type of technology existed.

We never had anything fancy like that in the Corsica. Heck, the Corsica didn't even have all four hubcaps. Let alone power anything. Oh but she ran, and in the end that's all that really matters. This new car of his is much more complicated, and truthfully, I don't think I will ever figure out how the 4 wheel drive works, let alone the shifting thing it does. With a mere tap of the gear shift thing, it can go from D to 4, to 3, etc. I don't even know what those are for anyway. It's not a manual transmission, but it does that shifting thing with barely a flick of a wrist. Puzzling.

He loves it though. I tried like all get out to get him to take my car again and let me keep the perty new one. He decided against that idea. I'm taking my baby in on Wednesday to get the muck and grime that happened to her while he was off driving her out in the wilds of Wyoming. I knew my car would be dirty, there's no way to avoid it in that environment. Man, the outside of it was completely covered in mud. The inside was not much better, but it will clean up nice still I'm sure.

Anyway, that's what's going on here. I'm doing well in my class, holding out at an "A" so far. I think I'll be able to maintain that. It was a fun class. I'm going to take more which is totally exciting really.

More later.

We Came We Saw We Ate Stuffing

Lots of Stuffing.

And best of all cranberry relish, YUM! I love cranberry relish. It was a delightful meal. I starved myself all day at work so that I could pig out afterward at my mom's house. It was great. I'm just mad at myself for not packing a piece of homemade pumpkin pie in my purse for later tonight. Oh well. I don't need the extra poundage anyway.

The stuffing was fabulous darling. Along with the candied yams, mashed potatoes, green beans, turkey and ham. Yummy. It was a really nice dinner. We all were Thankful for it, and each other. My cats were not happy with me for not bringing home any turkey. Two of them are sitting here pouting on my desk trying to make me feel guilty. That sleepy look in my eyes was a dead giveaway, and they knew right away I'd been eating turkey, overeating turkey.

I'm so thankful for the many blessings we have in our lives. Which mostly means I'm darn glad I have such loving family and friends, and a dear husband who spoils me rotten, and tells me all the time he couldn't live without me. Little does he know it is me who really couldn't live without him, who else can I be so open and trusting with all of my flaws and have him still adore me in the morning.

So, I'm very thankful for my marriage. I'm so glad we have each other. We have a beautiful daughter together who is so incredibly sweet, funny, and energetic. We are thankful for her too. She's got her father's amazing looks, and my crazy sense of humor. Everything is funny to her. I love that she can make me laugh so hard that my ribs hurt.

We are thankful for our jobs which provide us with a home, and the means to earn money to eat, and buy clothes, and many other things.

We are thankful that we have our families and friends close by, and can spend time with them.

Life is good. Thank God.

Laziness

It Will Cost You.

After much deliberation, going back and forth, and being overly agreeable, my girlfriend and I finally decided where we were going to go out to eat tonight. The problem wasn't that we could not reach an agreement, it was rather that no one really wanted to make the decision at all. We just wanted dinner, not too expensive, and decent, and neither of us wanted to cook it.

We were ultimately being lazy. We would rather have driven 15 minutes away from home to eat in a restaurant than go to the store and get something to make for dinner. Believe me, we thoroughly discussed the idea of just cooking at home, and after we threw out several ideas we decided that we would just meet somewhere with the kids and eat dinner.

It took us about a half an hour or more to come to our decision. We discussed it as I drove home from work, we discussed it after I got home, and we finally decided about 15 minutes later. Yeah, we were being total chicks about the whole thing. Talking about it, changing our minds, then deciding again.

Okay so we got there. Sat down. Ordered. They all got cheeseburgers of some sort, I was adventurous and got some teriyaki rice bowl thing. Their burger and fries showed up along with my bowl thing, and man, did I feel like I had the diet plate. A whole bunch of veggies, squash, broccoli, carrots, rice, a few pieces of chicken in this bowl with some sauce on it. They sat there eating their fries dipped in ranch dressing, and I ate my diet bowl. The bowl was much like one of those frozen dinner entrees one can get at the grocery store, it had about as much flavor as the box it probably came in.

I ate a bit, then pretty much gave up, and munched on leftover fries. My friend ordered the mushroom burger, there was way more mushrooms than burger which really grossed me out because I truly in my heart despise mushrooms. There were so many mushrooms on it, that it made the bun soggy so she just ate the mushrooms and the patty. Her daughter's burger let out a loud moo when she bit into it, it was sent back for more heat treatment. My daughter ate half of her burger and was full.

We got the bills, we had seperate checks, but all told it was about $50.00. My friend said on the way out, "We just spent $50 on french fries! And that doesn't include the tips we gave." And she was right, they were the only good thing we got for the most part. I said, "Never again. We have got to stop eating out, it's just a huge waste of money!"

Seriously, the Stouffer's Salisbury steak dinner I ate the last 2 nights in a row was better, and those things only cost me about $3.00 each. Yeah. I should have done the math ahead of time. Anyway, I'd rather not eat out so much then go out to a nice place once in a while instead.

So yes, we spent a lot for our laziness tonight. I've got to remember not to be so lazy in the future. Note to self: Buy more Stouffer's dinners, fill freezer.

I Just Want To Say

I've Given This A Lot Of Thought.

If McCain ends up running against Hillary in 08, I will vote for neither. I hope the Republicans aren't stuck with 2 democrats as a "choice." I'm serious. I've heard McCain suggested too often lately, and I'm getting a little queasy about that idea. I don't care for his politics. Everytime I hear anything about him, I find myself in complete disagreement with him.

Just saying is all.

Tumblweeda

It Is Windy.

Very windy out. Tumble weeds are flying everywhere. Empty trash cans have rolled out into the street and are lying there on their sides until the next big gust comes along and pushes them further out into the street. Leaves are floating around with no apparent plan to land anywhere soon.

Some of the fences have become tumble weed catching nets. Am I alone in that I find tumbleweeds somewhat funny? I don't know, they just make me want to laugh.

My daughter and I were noticing all the many tumbleweeds making their yearly jaunt from one side of the road to the other, and we kept pointing them out to each other. The bigger the better as tumble weeds go.

I remember it was about this time last year that I got a frantic phone call from my friend telling me that an enormous tumbleweed, "the size of my car, hit me while I was sitting at a traffic light!" She was quite frustrated about it and felt very helpless that the other people at the traffic light did nothing but stare in awe at the gigantic tumble weed that rolled over her car.

I imagined her bracing herself when the monster tumbled right over. How funny that must have looked to the other people at the traffic light, they might have even heard her screams from inside the vehicle. Of course I died laughing when she retold the story in all seriousness.

Yup, it's plenty windy out, so I called her before she left work to warn her about the giant tumbleweeds and to proceed home with caution. One can never be too careful.

The Worst Job

Ever.

I've talked about this before, but I think it was on the old blog I deleted a few months ago. Anyway, it doesn't matter. This afternoon I found myself remembering how completely awful my experience was working at a daycare center.

It most certainly wasn't the children who made the job so horrible. They were the only good thing about the place. It was the boss. She was the most awful woman I've ever had the displeasure to work for. She offered no support whatsoever to us, she was hateful, deceiptful and downright mean. How someone who lacked such compassion towards her fellow human beings could become the director of a daycare center is beyond me.

Oh yes, she could be nice. I was amazed at how nice she could be when in the presence of outsiders, especially her own boss. Otherwise she ruled the center with an iron fist, and seemed to take great joy in causing dissent amongst her pee-ons. She would lie straight to our faces and dare us to question it.

She particularly liked to pick on certain people. I got to be one of them for about the first 6 months of the year that I worked there. There were others. Usually the younger white girls, and the Japanese girls. She found us easy targets as we generally did not talk back, and could be brought to tears quick enough to please her. She treated the Philipinas of which she shared the same descent much better, and the rumor was she was too afraid to cross the black women that worked there, so they may have faired better with her.

There just wasn't much choice as far as jobs went when we were overseas. I managed to make it a year at that place, and then, thankfully it was time to move. I don't think I could have lasted much longer anyway.

One thing is for sure, she made me so much more thankful that I never had to put my child in that environment when she was little. Nothing happened as far as the workers that made me feel that way, it's just I know how unhappy people were there, and the children had to have picked up on that on some level.

What an awful experience.

Road Rage And Near Assault

A Friend's Tale.

Unbelievable. My friend was threatened with assault the other day by a complete stranger. Apparently my friend was driving on one of the main drags in our town, and pulled up to a stop light and the people in the car next to her started flipping her off. She did what anyone else would do and flipped the bird right back at them.

The people then followed her to her destination, and the next thing she knows she is being lambasted with numerous dirty words, to include, "you stupid white bitch, you didn't use your turn signal back there, I have a baby in the car. I'm going to kick your stupid white ass!" This "woman" yelled at her from her car, which she had pulled in behind my friend blocking her into her parking space.

My friend taunted her a bit, smiling and acting like it was no big deal, and then went into the store. The "lady" stayed out there screaming more, and then drove off. My friend was actually quite shaken by the whole ordeal, but decided not to back down to the woman who was begging for a fight.

The whole thing was just insane. What the hell is wrong with people?

Manners Can Make Or Break You

Good Morning.

Manners, or lack of them can ruin a friendship. It happened to me. Now I don't claim to be any sort of authority on this subject, but I certainly know when I've been put off by bad manners, sure at some point my lack of manners has bothered someone else. This former co-worker of mine left for greener pastures, she moved to another town in our state. We kept in touch calling each other every so often. We were sort of friends. She called me one day very excited that she had just got married. I congratulated her, and told her to text me her address that I would send a gift card.

She never sent the address, but one day calls me and says, "you still haven't sent my wedding gift, and we don't want a gift card, we want money instead, here is my address, now get that in the mail to me." My thought, "umm, yeah, that will happen never." You see I was very put off by her demand of a gift, and not just any gift, she wanted money. I'm surprised that she did not demand a specified amount, and frankly I have no idea what the appropriate amount would be, we're not that good of friends, just former associates really.

It was at that point that I decided I don't need "friends" like that anyway, and decided to forget she existed at all. Life is short, when they say you can count the good friends of a lifetime on one hand, I believe that saying to be true. At this point in time in my life, I am much better at weeding the garden, and I don't have a lot of time for people who are of the weed category. Yet, she has called me several more times only to be conveniently redirected to voicemail. The first call she told me that I was sooooo rude because I had not sent her wedding gift. I laughed about that one, and let my family listen to it.

I kept ignoring her calls and she called to tell my voicemail that I was rude because I did not return her calls. When that approach did not work, she started being nicer and would call and say, "It's been a long time since we talked, you must be very busy, or you don't want to talk to me." Bingo! Someone has got a clue.

Now sure, I could just call her and say, "well, you are rude, and I have no desire for anymore interaction with you." But, she seems fairly confrontational about the fact that I did not send the money she required as a gift from me, so I don't think I want to go there. I have a feeling she is just hoping to get me on the phone so she can dump some junk on me, and feel better. I don't have to deal with that confrontation, and I choose not to. At most I will text her and tell her to have a nice life. As I said, we were never that close of friends. We never associated outside of work, or in any real social manner at all.

Anyway, I've discovered the art of not returning a phone call, and it feels good. At some point she was bordering on stalker, but in time, I guess she will realize I'm not going to be sucked in. I guess I am rude for not returning her calls. Two wrongs don't make a right, but in this case, I can live with my own bad manners. I generally don't treat people like this, but when red flags start popping up all over the place, I try not to ignore them.

This is just one example of how important good manners are in our interactions with other people. To demand a gift from someone was something I was taught was bad manners. To specify which gift unless otherwise asked was outside of the realm of politeness. With family and close friends, things can be a bit more relaxed, but in my experience it was never acceptable to demand a gift from anyone.

Sometimes we have to ask for things from others in life. It is a hard fact to face. It is not easy to do. I've never been comfortable in asking things of others. It goes back to not wanting to put people out. I hate to impose on people. Granted we are in this thing together, and sometimes we have to lean on others. There is definitely a line that can be crossed do you need it, or just want it. Perhaps she needed money, but we are not close enough for her to ask that of me.

I don't know if I will let her off the hook, or just let her think she dumped me. I haven't decided how to handle this situation other than ignore it up until now. She called last night and left a message while I was in class. I wouldn't have taken the call anyway, but maybe I should let her off the hook and tell her to bug off or something. She obviously does not get why I am put off by her, if she did then she wouldn't keep calling me and telling me how rude I am for this and that.

What Do You Know?

I Don't Know Either.

I don't think 10 minutes is long enough for me to write a post particularly when I don't even have anything planned to write about. I have no choice though, I've got to leave to go pick up the youngster at school and I can't be late. Then I've got class tonight so I might as well scrap the whole idea altogether.

Problem is, I've always got at least one problem to moan about it seems, for some reason I am more creative at 3:00a.m. Wouldn't you know, that's the time I'm usually dreaming wild and crazy dreams. And lately, the only thing I'm doing at that time of the day is snoring and fighting with 120 pounds of deadweight dogs trying to get at least one corner of the blanket to keep warm by, me trying to keep warm that is, they do just fine it seems.

That new one, she's a complete and total bedhog, she eats like food is going out of style soon, and has steadily put on I would guess at least 5 pounds since she moved in and took over the place. In other words, she's fitting right in with the rest of the beasts we call pets in this house.

I guess that's why she's so darn sweet towards us all, she's ever thankful we bailed her out of jail. Just like jail, I think they fed her the bare minimum, she was pretty skinny when we got 'er. She's definitely bulking up some, and probably going to be nice and fat for winter. Ah well, she's a total keeper so I can't complain. I think she will settle down on the eating thing once she realizes she is home for good, and I do keep the bowl full, no matter how difficult that has been to do lately with her.

Alas my time is up for now. I must go. Back later.

Something

As Good As Anything I Suppose.

I've got to post something so that French crap isn't the first post on the page. Actually I really enjoyed learning the French language, and studying the culture. I took 3 years of it in high school, but you wouldn't know it. I've retained very little of the language. This was way back in the late 80's when people didn't talk all that bad about France.

My teacher, the most delightful man, had gone to France on a teacher exchange program the year prior so he had many interesting stories to tell about living in France. This was back when teachers weren't all a bunch of commie socialists, so he was quite honest about the downfalls of Socialism.

He was even somewhat forgiving about how the French teacher left his house. See, they switched everything, including homes. It seems she had an aversion to taking out the trash, and went about piling it up in his garage for the entire year that she was here. I point blank asked him why she would do such a horrendous thing, and he was quite honest when he said, "She thought we had too much, she did it because she was mad about how much we Americans have." I'm not lying about this people. That was the answer he gave me.

Thankfully, while he had good things to say, he was quite honest when he relayed his experiences. This is how I learned that, at that time anyway maybe it has changed by now, French people only bath so often. It was the hot water, you see, it was expensive to heat the water. Probably still is, who knows. I had a similar experience in Japan. We had to actually warm up the water before we could use it, thanks to their ingenuity the water was warm within a matter of minutes with a simple flip of a switch. Although I bathed every day, we only used hot water for our showers, the rest of the time it was washing dishes in cold, washing clothes in cold, and although we had a dryer, the Japanese dryer is completely useless.

How useless? Well, it takes twice as long to dry half a load, and it is also too costly to operate. Pretty much everyone hangs their clothes on their balconey to dry, even in the humid climate of Okinawa they seemed to dry faster than in that little dryer. So, when in Rome. That's what we did too. And shocker of shockers we're still alive to talk about it. It was upon the advice of an American who had married an Okinawan that we met early on in our stay there, he knew how to get by financially living on the Japanese economy. We took the advice, it served us well.

Well the dog passing gas under the desk tells me it is time to bring this post to an end. Perhaps she is hinting around that I do something a little more productive like refill the food and water bowls, or a general clean up around the house which is nearly in shambles as I write this. Ha! Who am I kidding? I'm not cleaning tonight. Me too tired.

Monsieur Conner

Pardon My French.

Monsieur Conner he is so French.
He likes to eat escargot.
He likes to eat coq au vin.
He likes to sit in la cafe,
sipping tiny cups full of creme.
He likes to watch the people go by.
He like to wear his orange beret.

Monsieur Toby
He is not French.
He likes to have big giant gun
He likes to watch cowboys run
He is so American.
He does not like escargot.
He does not like orange cat.

But Monsieur Conner he is so French.
He likes to sit in la cafe.
He likes to eat escargot.
He likes to eat coq au vin.
He does not like American gun.
But he is so very French.

Election Woes

What Does It Mean?

At this point I don't know. I did what I could do, what is in my power to do. I voted. My friend smirked about the win, she's a Democrat. I've tried. It is her right to be a democrat. I will always disagree with Socialism, and therefore cannot align myself with that.

This morning as I contemplated the Republican defeat, I thought well, all we can do is ride the wave, and hope for the best. What more can I say?

My mother and I shared the same melancholy sadness about the results of the election. People are generally unhappy about our government, and I think there will be much more of that to come.

What do I know? My husband and I are "rich", we make more than we should be allowed, therefore we must give some of that away to lazy people who do not wish to work as hard, or who will not give up their drugs, drinking, or slovenly ways and stop reproducing long enough to achieve any progress on their own behalf. Why should they? Uncle Sam is more than willing to give them the fruits of our labor.

Who cares if we have a child that is developmentally disable? How dare we wish to accumulate wealth for her? How dare WE want to provide for her a future (if necessary), rather then throwing her to the wolves and making big daddy government take care of her.

You know why I bitch about high taxes all the time? Because in my heart I know it is taken away from my kid to support lazy people who want all the benefits without the effort. I see them, I know what is going on. I know how the system works and is abused by so many people.

I mean it, and I'm not apologizing for wanting to take care of my own family.

Quizzing Thing

What American accent do you have? Your Result: The West Your accent is the lowest common denominator of American speech. Unless you're a SoCal surfer, no one thinks you have an accent. And really, you may not even be from the West at all, you could easily be from Florida or one of those big Southern cities like Dallas or Atlanta.
The Midland
Boston
North Central
The South
The Inland North
Philadelphia
The Northeast
What American accent do you have? Take More Quizzes

a la Tinkerty Tonk

Dear Insurance Company

I Apologize.

Admittedly I lost faith, I spoke too soon, and now you've gone and fixed the problem, so I'm sorry for the hard feelings I had towards you. Even though it took a while to hear back from you, you were very nice when you called. I was also very glad to hear that you are going to honor our previous agreement and pay for the value of the lost vehicle. It really is a relief to know that our car troubles are lessening, and we may be back to normal soon enough.

I just wanted to say so since I talked all that trash about you a couple posts down.

A Breather

Whew! Deep Cleansing Breath.

It was super slow at work today so I took the opportunity to get the heck out of Dodge and come home and catch up on the stuff that has been overwhelming me this week. I'm finally caught up on my studies, I can't believe I let myself get so far behind. I even washed the dishes! I felt an immediate sense of relief when I closed that chapter knowing I was done for a little while.

Last night the daughter and I laughed our fannies off at those pictures I posted of the doggies. She put the shirt on the little girl, and as usual she got started on something and things went from there. I did get a good deep belly laugh out of the thing, my abs haven't seen that much action in too long. At one point I laid there on the floor laughing, and you know what? My kid was laughing right along with me, and it was good. With all the busy stuff we haven't has as much time to just goof off together.

The dogs are none the worse for wear, although it might seem like it, they were not traumatized in the least. They ran off like it was nothing when we finally freed them from the human clothing, and then the fun was over with only pictures left to tell the story. I had to get back to reality when she started looking for cats to dress up. It felt like I was being a spoil sport, but it was going too far. My cats are not underwear wearing types.

It may be surmised from our pictures that we have no living room furniture, and that would be accurate. We do have a big OLD and tattered sectional couch downstairs, but we never really needed more than that when we were just renting. It is not really that big of a deal, we'll get something eventually after things equalize more from buying the house and stuff. I know a lot of people go out and buy all new furniture and stuff when they buy a house, but we've got cats, dogs, and a rough and tumble kid who is still pretty hard on stuff, so it is not a high priority right now. That's the polite way of saying, it is not in the budget at this particular time.

The kitchen is pretty much the heart of our home anyway, maybe that's why we don't really miss it all that much. Whenever people visit we always gravitate towards the kitchen table anyway, of course that could be because we don't have a couch in there, and the downstairs seems to most people this mysterious place that my husband runs off to after a certain amount of time has passed. He's down here playing his game on the computer, he's more introverted than I am.

People used to think he was mad or being unfriendly, now they just holler down the stairs a quick hello and get on with the visit. It took some assurances that no, he's not avoiding them, he's just not a big sit around the table and chick chat type. Anyway, he only has a certain amount of time when he gets home for his week off, and I would rather he spend it how he likes. We do a lot of bonding the first few days. He has even started going to the grocery store with me once in a while and running errands, that's highly unusual, but he has been.

When we first got married I used to try to drag him out shopping with me, it was horrible for both of us. He hates shopping, I hate shopping with him. That much we do agree on. We usually got in fights because he was annoyed with my stop and look, and I was annoyed with his lack of enthusiasm at all the pretty things. The man does not get the window shopping concept all right? It is just a dumb thing to do in his eyes.

Anyway, it is going to be a long haul this time, he'll be gone for 3 weeks, home for Thanksgiving, which of course I will be working on, because no one gets holidays off where I work. Thems the breaks. I work the holidays so I can have my job the rest of the year. I've accepted it. I'm not going to complain about it. At least he will be home.

My brother has been staying every night because I'm a big ole wuss, and can't sleep when my man isn't home. It has actually been fun. My brother was only about 15 years old when I got married, so we've done a lot of catching up in the last couple of years. We're like great friends, and both have a wicked sense of humor.

My posts are too long, meandering, and dare I say, pointless? Forgive my rambling, but thanks for listening. I am not a woman of few words apparently. I envy those who can write short entertaining snippets.

Quiz Thingie

I Love These Things.

Your Dominant Intelligence is Interpersonal Intelligence

You shine in your ability to realate to and understand others. Good at seeing others' points of view, you get how people think and feel. You have an uncanny ability to sense true feelings, intentions, and motivations. A natural born leader, you are great at teaching and mediating conflict. You would make a good counselor, salesperson, politician, or business person.

What Kind of Intelligence Do You Have?

Link found at Tinkerty Tonk

Pay Attention To Me

Um, Happy Halloween

Dogs In Underpants

"Will we be getting treats soon?"

"If my pants weren't so tight, I would runaway up the stairs...if only I could get away..."

Little Sweetie

We Put Clothes On Our Dogs

Baby Girl

Does Anybody Care?

My Continuing Angst.

I've had it up to my head. I despise insurance companies for the crooked beings they are. We haven't heard a single thing from our insurance company about our car, it's going on a month now since my husband had his accident.

My friend notifies me that a co-worker's daughter had an accident in Wy. about the same time, totalling her car, her car has already been replaced, the whole process took maybe 2 weeks at most. I have not yet received a return call from our so called adjuster about anything at all. We finally gave up and called the 1-800 number and had a customer service representative tell us what was going on. Good thing we did because we found out they were going to have the car towed the next day, gee, thanks for letting us know.

That was the last we heard about anything at all. We've received no other information from our insurance company, which is actually supposed to be a good company, but I'm getting a little worried. (Here I go with the worrying--gah!)

Not to bring up the past or anything, but some might recall that at this time last year I was in a car accident which was no fault of my own, I was rear ended by two people while sitting in traffic, and our big gigantic sturdy truck was bent all to heck. It sits dog legged on the side of our house waiting, waiting for the insurance companies to do something to rectify the situation. I mean really, contrary to popular belief, we don't just give them many hundreds a year to just do nothing. They made a bargain, but are not noble enough to hold up their end of it, it is truly shameful.

Don't get me started on health insurance, oh, what the heck. We pay $235/month for health insurance, we have a $1000/per family deductible per year. We've come just shy of the deductible thanks to an e.r. visit for stitches, and a couple of doctor office visits. We'll be paying for that ourselves I suppose. Not to mention we've forked out nearly $2000 to the insurance company for "coverage." That brings our whopping total to $3000 that we will pay this year, not to mention that brief period of time when we didn't have any health insurance, and accrued some bills. Given the $3000 dollar total, what has our insurance company actually paid? $10/month for my prescription, I pay $38 for it. That's it.

Okay, so tell me again why we have health insurance? I know I know, just in case we have a big, big cost. As my dad says, "they bet you won't, you bet you will." Sure, with a child with a blood disorder, it's worth the cost for us to pay for it to protect us in the case of a hospital stay, or something else. It just sort of burns my butt, and I'll tell you why, because I know people who don't pay squat for their own health care, we pay for it. These same people have birthed a child a year for the last 3 years, all on the taxpayer dime.

You know what else, my husband and I work hard. We work our asses off. He's freezing his balls off in Wyoming working on a rig to make enough money to put us in a better financial position in life, and the government sees fit to take the bounty of his blood, sweat and tears and give it to someone else. Someone undeserving. I'm running around here like a chicken with my head cut off trying to keep up with a house, a child with special needs, my own job which is physically demanding, I'm going to school, and paying with it with, GASP, our own money, and I'm tired of watching shiftless bums ride the system for all it is worth. I'm tired of it people.

My dad the optimist says, "be thankful you have health insurance, be thankful for what you have, be thankful you have the money to pay to taxes." I get the concept. I am thankful, I just can shake the resentment, and I know it is wrong to carry it. I sit here thinking what am I some kind of greedy penny pincher? Is it so wrong to want to leave an inheritance to our own child? What's left after we pay for the rest of society's freeloaders? What do we get to keep?

I'm going to keep going to spite the mooches of the world. I'll keep working, I'll keep improving so I can make more, I will reluctantly give through taxation, but I will never agree with it, and I will never think it is right. I will most certainly not vote for any party that wants to give more of my money to pay for the bad choices of other people.

There, that's my angst, I'm letting it out. I'm trying to move on from here. Some things we just can't control or help.

Ritualistic Barfing Ceremony

The Dogs Have Bonded. I Think.

Strange very strange. This morning my brother and I went outside to watch the dogs play in the yard, all right, I can't lie, we were smoking cigarettes. Big nasty dangerous cigarettes, but we were outside, and we were watching the dogs, we were just smoking while we did it.

We noticed that both of them were grazing on the grass that grows at the edge of the patio. This is normal, we thought. Toby often takes a bite of grass while out there, my sister's dogs come to visit, they nibble on the grass, it must be some tasty grass. The dogs were really scarfing it up, we noted how much of it they were eating.

Toby finally sat down, and within seconds hocked up a big steaming pile of grass. This is something I've never seen him do. "Oh great! Well I'm glad he did that out here and not inside!" I told my brother who found the thing pretty funny. We looked at the little girl dog and noticed that she was still steadily chomping away at the grass, and decided maybe we better keep them outside for a bit, and just as we said it, she sat down and hocked up two steaming piles of grass.

It was the strangest thing, why they both did this at practically the same time is beyond me. I've never seen Toby do it before, and to have them both do it was rather strange. I don't know, and I guess I never will. My brother found the whole thing amusing, especially the part where I gagged really bad each time one of them puked up the grass. I couldn't help it, it was gross to see. Yet, I couldn't look away. Weird.

I hope they aren't sick or anything. I guess we'll see, they both seem unbothered by the whole thing. I have appointments for both of them at the vet next week. Toby is getting a doggy pedicure, how freakin' decadent is that? Seriously. She will be getting her shots, and an overall examination, poor girl. I think Toby will need shots too, the vet will know that I'm sure.

And the saying goes, dogs will be dogs. I rushed them into the house after that so that neither got the notion to gobble up the steaming grass piles. Dude that is sick.

Please Let Me Introduce

Our Bouncing Baby Girl.

Weighing in at 50lbs. Little miss Carly has brought a ray of sunshine into our lives. We brought her home from the Humane Society just 2 nights ago, and she's been an absolute doll baby ever since. Our big boy Toby seems to adore her, and she's fitting in quite well. We couldn't be more pleased to have her, and I think she shares that emotion.

Look at that face, what an angel.

Halp Are Trupes

More.

First spotted this picture at DragonLady's World

I Better Study Harder

Or I'm Going To Iraq.

If someone had told me that the man said such a thing even I might have questioned the truth in it, but it is true, John Kerry did say to paraphrase, if you study hard, and are smart you can do well, if you don't well, you get stuck in Iraq. It's true. There are videos all over the web of him actually inserting his own foot into that humongous cavity below his nose. People, believe me when I say, I am so incredibly thankful that this man was not elected President.

Feast your eyes on this video I found over at the Purple Avenger's blog.

You Ask, We Deliver

Get 'Em Here.

My friend is always ordering me around, and demanding I send her kit pics. She's like Peppermint Patty, and I'm the girl with the glasses who follows her around and calls her "sir." She asks, I give. So, my phone is full of kit pics, and here is one of them:

I'm Avoiding Responsibility

There I've Confessed.

It's my Friday, which doesn't really mean a thing because it is nobody else's Friday therefore I still have to do all the other stuff I don't do when it's only my Monday or Tuesday. I could be studying, picking up the house, or watching dish water evaporate, but no, I choose to be here, with you. Because in truth I really do like you.

So while I'm here avoiding doing anything that requires lifting more than a finger on a keyboard I might as well put something down to read. Mr. Conner my cat doesn't really fancy the idea at all, he would rather I pet him and give him some attention. Lately he's been doing this really cute thing where he lays in my arms just like a little baby, and he purrs, oh the purring, it is darn near hypnotic.

I'm sure it is absolutely rivetting to hear all about my cat, but it does give my fingers something to do while I try to retrieve the actual ideas that were swirling around in my head so prominently throughout the week. It has become a real problem for me actually, I have such a difficult time retaining an idea for a convenient time to write about it. I've been struggling with it for a while, my memory that is, and have yet to figure out why I can't hold a thought any longer than say your average houseplant. I've always been very sure and confident about my memory, I can recall things in vivid detail from many many years ago, but I'm at a loss when I try to remember what thought was so clear just yesterday.

It probably doesn't help much to be very preoccupied with a great many other things at the same time. Everything just becomes all jumbled in there. I am doing all right with my class however, which does bring a bit of relief. Although, the last 2 chapters really racked my brains and had me rethinking my plans for world domination, oops, I mean, getting a degree.

I hate that dull fog that comes over my mind sometimes. I've always thought, probably foolishly, that my mind was one of my better assets, which has sometimes led me to think I'm smarter than I actually am. That is a bit disappointing to me, but what is always needed in a situation like that is just a little humbling, and I'm getting that with chapters 7 and 8.

It doesn't help that I've already set it in my mind that anything less than an "A" in my class means I am a complete and total failure. Heh. Just kidding, but I would like to earn an "A" if at all possible. There is this constant conversation playing out in my mind where I question everything and anything I ever planned on doing. This is the part where I start worrying that I worry too much. Imagine that type of burden, worrying about worrying, that's usually when I just throw my hands up in the air and say to hell with it all, I'm a neurotic flake.

Now after all of that, will you believe me if I say, I'm actually pretty happy about my life? I'm all right. Tomorrow is another day, I have God, I have life, I have love, I have family, the rest is just details. So what if I've got the short term memory of a banana peel. I'm going to bed early tonight, I've got a lot of catching up to do, and I think I have a test tomorrow, which means I can't miss class to take my kiddo trick or treating. I'll figure something out.

Not Quite Accurate, But The First Sentence

At Least It Is A New Post.

You Are a "Don't Tread On Me" Libertarian

You distrust the government, are fiercely independent, and don't belong in either party. Religion and politics should never mix, in your opinion... and you feel opressed by both. You don't want the government to cramp your self made style. Or anyone else's for that matter. You're proud to say that you're pro-choice on absolutely everything!

What's Your Political Persuasion?

Link found at Miriam's Ideas

Good Morning

Ranting Raving Lunatics Unite Here

What does That Say For The Rest Of The Thing?

Well. Oh shoot this bold thingy is stuck again. I tell you, it can be tricky using the computer. One thing that hasn't been tricky is the class that I'm taking. To date I have aced all 3 of my exams. Not too shabby for a chick who last went to college in the early 90's. I just might actually get through the class and raise the dilapidated and neglected grade point average that I abandoned 13 years ago when this extremely hot, handsome and charming Marine swept me off my feet and made me his kept woman.

The man has been keeping me very well ever since. Hush now, I know you want to hear more about the hot and steamy handsome Marine man I married, but that's not what I'm here to talk about. Just know that although there have been some bumpy times, it pretty much has been a marriage made in heaven. He's not a Marine anymore, but he's still as handsome as ever, I guess some would say once a Marine, always a Marine, but you know what I'm saying don't you?
I better stop, it sounds like I'm bragging. If there is anything I've learned lately is to stop taking things for granted and thinking everything is going just perfectly. Besides nobody likes bragging, including me. I hate it really.

Recently I've been asking, just what exactly has feminism done for me lately? Huh? Answer that one. I mean really, my sister and I sat at the kitchen table last night and tried to come up with the answer to this very important question. Do you feel duped? Do you feel like you have it all? Really, I feel like I've got to work full-time, parent full-time, and do as much housework as women have always done since the dawn of modern appliances. I feel like I'm doing it all, and doing it all half assed.

I'm not the queen of my domain, keeper of the home, maker of the peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with the crusts neatly trimmed off. No, I'm the rushing around, putting it off for later, constantly cleaning, doing laundry, working, hair combing, hoping everything comes together just right one. I'm the one who sends extra money so the kiddo can eat breakfast at school because we are too tired to get up that much earlier to make it, besides, I don't have time, I have to get myself ready to go to work so that I can be an equal earner. Is this the part where I'm supposed to be glad that I can go out and work just as hard as a man, and try to raise a child at the same time?

Is it so wrong that I would rather be home with my child? Even though she is already 11 years old, I still see that she needs me as much today as ever. What obligation do men feel in all of this? Men don't feel obliged to support the family alone, they expect their wives to get out there and work just as hard as they do, they have been told over and over that women want to do this, that women will do this. My husband comes home to a messy house, uncooked food, and empty pantry. Who has time for grocery shopping? Noodles again. Oh wait, I've got this jar of spaghetti sauce we can throw it on these egg noodles, sprinkle some parmesean cheese on, voila, dinner is served. He doesn't say it, but I'm sure he remembers that his mother always had a meal on the table, but she was a stay at home mom, I am not a housewife.

Sure, I could just give up this absurd notion of going to school, but I have at most 10 more years in my profession before either my arms fall off or my back gives out. Not to mention I don't fancy the notion of being a 60 year old massage therapist trying to work until retirement. When my body starts hurting, which is quite often these days, I find it more and more difficult to picture myself doing this the rest of my life. I have no idea what working day in and day out in a darkened room will do for my eyes, but the term "mole people" has crossed my mind, although in reality I think it is probably better for my eyes than staring at a computer screen all day.

Leaving my field altogether is something that I am not ready to do yet, but perhaps going to school will help make that feel more comfortable to me. I truly feel at peace with my work. I don't know if I will be able to keep pace and multi-task and do all of those fancy busy things other people do at work, I'm used to quiet, peace, beautiful music, snoring people, the smell of lavender. Oh in due time I suppose, things will balance out.

And that my dears is the great thing about being a citizen of the U.S. of A. We can do something different, we can change careers, go back to school, start over. It is very American to be able to decide at 36 years old, hey, I think I will do something else. Other people in the world do not have that flexibility, you are what you are, and it is a ridiculous notion to think of trying to change that, heck in Japan, if you aren't up to muster in the 9th grade, there is no reason to even go on to high school, let alone college.

Funny I chose a career where I pamper and care for people at work, when what I would have been happy to do was stay home and do the same for my family. In fact, making people feel good is the best part of my job. What I have in mind will be a bit different than what I'm used to, but I'm hoping that by choosing a degree that is in high demand, I may find it easier to get out there even if I'm not a perky 24 year old.

Yeah Yeah Yeah, I've got it all planned now. We'll see. We shall see.

P.S. Don't worry, I'm not going to school for writing, the world has more than enough pontificating "bloviators". Heh.

My Tenets Of Being Conservative

It Isn't Commie For Starters.

As always Francis Porretto provokes thought, and inspires comment. His post on how even conservatives smear themselves really made me ask the question of myself, what do I picture a conservative to be, or how should one act? I came up with a list in my head last night of things that I associate with being politically conservative, sure there are few politicians who represent these that I know of, but I guess there is always hope. The left would more than happily portray conservatives as rigid, unchanging, uptight religious zealots, living in trailer parks, shooting at squirrels, but I don't see it that way.

Even among people who describe themselves politically as conservatives, there are those who I find rather repugnant, some I find ridiculous in their snobbery, and even worse, they make me want to disassociate myself from them. The internet has been wonderful for conservatives, although sometimes I find myself embarrassed of some of the stuff people put out there.

I am a conservative:

1. I believe if someone attacks our country, it should not be a question of whether we retaliate or not, but WHEN will we retaliate.

2. I believe people who move here should learn our language, integrate our culture, and embrace our values, or leave. That includes people who were born here.

3. I believe the government would be terrible at the administration of health care, and that we should keep it private. I literally tremble with fear at the idea that someday one of these bozos might actually get that stuff through the government, and toss it on us.

4. I support the police department, however, I revoke support of the police when they start treating law abiding citizens like criminals, or they are used to generate revenue for the state from law abiding citizens in the form of sting operations/set ups and cameras on street lights.

5. I reject the rape of the bank accounts of the producing, working people of this country that is currently enforced by the government.

6. I reject the notion that I somehow owe a portion of my earnings to people that have children they can't afford, or people who do not work period.

7. I believe at least half of all government employees should be fired and made to get real jobs in the private sector.

8. I despise bureaucrats.

9. I believe the U.N. is corrupt, useless, and we should remove membership in the body altogether.

10. I don't believe we should ever grant citizenship to anyone who forces entry into our country illegally and sets up house. Anyone doing so should most certainly not be the recipient of any government hand out program such as food stamps and health care. The fact that the bureaucrats have deemed it appropriate to pay the hospital bills of illegal aliens while milking the paychecks of tax paying citizens shows just exactly how useless our government has become.

11. I believe the biggest communist threat to this country is the political left, who would gladly crawl into bed with the likes of Fidel Castro.

12. I believe in the right to bear arms, and that it is absolutely necessary in this day and age to protect that right, whether I actually own a gun or not.

13. I still believe the U.S. is the leader of the free world, and that this is the best country to be in, but we are not doing a good job of protecting our own inalienable rights.

14. I believe in protecting and preserving natural beauty in places like Yellowstone. I believe in conserving resources and wasting as little as possible, but realize that we might have to use some of our own resources as well. I do think a balance could be struck if extremists were not involved.

15. I believe everything is polarized politically, and I've never seen so many people dig their heels in the way they do these days. I also think people have become extremely hateful about their views, and I suppose I'm guilty of that as well.

I think that is enough for one day.

Where To Begin

Stuck At Home.

Everyone has cleared out so it is just the kiddo and I tonight, although my brother may show up later. And yes, I am pretty much stuck at home relying on the generosity of others this week. Sure a ride is only a phone call away, but the convenience of getting in the car and going whenever I please is just not available at the moment. Which makes it almost impossible to comprehend that in some places like say, New York City, some people don't even own cars of their own.

I've never been there but I suppose that things are pretty conveniently located then, they must be, but out here things are spread out. Sure we have a city bus system here, and forgive me for saying so, I wouldn't if it weren't true, but a lot of the bus passengers I've encountered were rather frightening people. Now now, hear me out. I hate snobbery as much as anyone else, I promise I'm not being a snob here, but I cannot deny that there have been times I've actually been scared of some of the people I've encountered on the bus. The most disarming part of any bus travel here is the inevitable stop at the main bus station.

Now I don't know if it is just our town, but for some reason there are a lot of people congregating at the bus station who have switchy eyes, have not bathed in while, and are apt to carry on conversations with themselves. Not only that, but it was at our very bus station that my best friend and I saw for the first time in our life a man with extremely large boobs, we were just 13 years old, and it was quite troubling to us at the time. We honestly did not know what to make of the situation. Add to all of the aforementioned a seedy element, and some angry looking youths, and well, anyone can see why some people would rather drive themselves to their intended location. I'm not going to lie, the bus felt dirty, and there were people who smelled bad on it.

In fact, the last time I rode the bus I was 18 years old and had pissed off my parents to the point that they took my car away and I had to get a bus pass. Dad took pity on me after a month of bus riding and finally gave the car back. I never screwed up like that again. It was not a time I remember fondly at all. That's it. Unless I bum a ride from someone, my only option is the bus, and that is why I will pretty much be homebound until hubby gets home again. It is not just the bus passengers that make bus riding so unappealing, the bus system itself takes literally hours off the lives of unsuspecting travellers as well, it takes forever to get anywhere. Mind you I'm not feeling sorry for myself, I'm just relaying the very unimportant facts of my life at the moment. It's pretty much what I do here, and why only about .00001 percent or less of the population of the U.S. reads this stuff, but I do thank you both for stopping by.

Quick Post

No Time For This Bit Here.

Been slaving away with hubby cleaning out the garage. It was bonding over boxes. It looks so much better. I have to study, actually, finish a "comprehensive" problem that is due on Tuesday. Hubby will be taking my beautiful new car to work this week, it is the best solution to our little problem of his car being all smashed up and all. I'm pretty much on a mini vacation right now so, I'll be hanging at home, which means I will more than likely have more than enough time to write about all sorts of things like, why some women like to stalk me, what falling off the wagon really means, and how altogether blessed we are as a family.

Sure some people might not think totalling two cars in less than a year means one is blessed, but we don't agree, at least we had the cars, and walked away. This would be a good time for a smelly old Corsica update. I would like to report that the Corsica and its new owners are getting along wonderfully. In fact, the last time I saw her, the lady we gave it to that is, she told me if it weren't for that Corsica, she would not have been able to go to her father's funeral out of state. Of course I think they were lucky the car made such a journey, but I tell you those things make up in dependability what they lack in appearance.

Just go to any town in America, and I guarantee one will find at least one fully operational Corsica that was made in 1990 or so. Sure most of them have at least one door that is a completely different color from the rest of the car, and there is always the common polka dot pattern of paint chipping on the hood, not to mention the strange shredded appearance the back seat seems to take on, but the thing will be running. Ugly or not, smelly or not people are still driving those things. Frankly, I get rather excited when I see one running. Every once in a while I see a fine specimen with barely any of the above, and it is quite a wonder to behold.

Of course the self conscious Corsica drivers don't quite understand my staring in admiration, but being the friendly sorts that usually drive Corsicas they don't take my gawking too seriously. Perhaps I was a little too zealous in my desire to give the Corsica away. Heck, she's running still, and I'm toying with having to rent a car eventually if the insurance company doesn't get a move on. My husband and I are sticking to our resolve that we are not going to worry, we are just going to deal with things as they come.

Given my history of worrying about anything and everything it has been tempting to go to there, to the comfortable fretting place that I usually exist in, but I'm just not going to allow myself that. I'm going to have faith. I'm going to be grateful and thankful for what I have right at this very moment. There is still a Corsica driver in me, and for goodness sakes if I ever learned anything it is, Corsica drivers DO NOT Worry. Period.

It Is Good To Be Alive

Sometimes You Just Have To Say It.

Well, we don't know what is going to happen to hubby's completely smashed up little Jeep Liberty, but I will tell you this much, I would say it was a good car given my husband and his passenger walked away from their tumble, one and a half times, with some scratches and some achy muscles. Of course, my husband may be in more pain than he's let on, he's one of those tough guys who suffers silently. Whaling like a banshee is more my style, he's more dignified about things.

We both know what could have happened. What we could have lost. Neither of us can say it out loud so much, but we both know. His car landed about 10 feet from a ravine. We can imagine what a difference that 10 feet could have made.

The connection that normally exists between us has intensified. Being reminded how easily things can change usually has that effect on people I would guess. I love that man, I thank God right here and now that my loving husband is still with us. We've been doing a lot of hugging lately.

We don't know what the outcome will be with insurance and the car or any of that. We don't even know how he is going to get to work next week. He may take my car, then I will need transportation. Sure, these are things to worry about, but they do seem small in the overall scheme of things. It will all work itself out eventually I suppose. We'll figure something out.

Dude

My Fears Have Been Realized.

Let me preface this with saying that while living in Japan I became comfortable with using the Japanese potty, but there was a part of me that always wondered what a sight it would be if the door accidentally opened while I was in that precarious position.

Well, here you go:

I Promise

To Post Soon.

My my. I tell you, if I wasn't about to pass out into a deep sleep I would take more time to write something completely unimportant for you all to read. However, I have only had about 4 hours sleep in the last day and a half or something, I can't even think clearly, and today I actually do have something important to say:

Let me just put it this way, he is all right, thank the Lord in Heaven above. Last night hubby rolled his car on a cold lonely Wyoming highway. I left at 2:00a.m. to pick him up in Laramie Wyoming. It was a tough drive, the weather was nasty, and I just wanted to get to him as fast as possible to see for myself that he was really okay, plus I was scared that I might end up in a ditch myself with the road conditions.

Anyway, I will write more later. Just wanted to check in, honestly, it has been a hell week for me. Oh and I had a test today in my class, I'm quite anxious to see how well I did on that, I was pretty dazed by the time I went to take it. I guess we will be in the market for a new car.

Back soon.

Yum

+


Pie.

My Lovely daughter took the pictures.

Proof

My Pets Are Bums.

Sometimes The Title Is The Hardest Part

Then There Is This Bit Here.

Hello friends, this is me. I'm even in a good mood tonight. It was probably that 2 hour nap I took today, but I don't even feel like writing mean things at all. Although, I don't usually plan all that much what I'm going to write, I normally just sit down and start writing so I can't promise for sure. I have no more idea than you do where this post is going. It's kind of exciting isn't it? Well, isn't it?

I probably shouldn't write about the little news tidbit I heard on the radio today about how some Principal at a school in Norway has declared that the boy students are forever more required to sit down to relieve themselves. To PEE, she wants them to sit down to pee. Now, of course I have no personal or invested (hahaha, I think that should say vested instead of invested, I'm leaving it because I think it is funny and humbling) interest in whether a boy, or even a grown man finds it more comfortable to sit down to pee or what have you, but immediately, my son, the one I never had, popped into my head and my first reaction was, "Oh no no, there is no way a school is going to say that my son has to sit down to pee, standing up to pee is part of being a man gosh dang it, and the reason men like camping outdoors much more than most women it is a right, or should be declared one if necessary."

My sister and I have reached the conclusion that mothers and their sons have a special bond that those of us who are mothers of daughters alone cannot understand, however I can verify that I have witnessed this mothers and their sons thing on various occasions, it is as true as I sit here, some mothers favor their sons more, even over their own daughters as well. That is not to say that they would not protect their daughter, but I've noticed that some women really go overboard for their boys.

It can be quite annoying, especially to my sister who has to deal with the mothers of 40 year old sons which call her to try and get things done on behalf of their obviously spoiled and inept grown sons. Really, she deals with these mothers all the time. She notes that she rarely if ever has mothers calling for the same reasons for their grown daughters.

Hey, I live with it. As much as I love my mother in law, she changes when my husband comes home for his week off. She's suddenly up cooking and cleaning, and doing all sorts of things that she doesn't necessarily feel the urgency to do when it is just us here. Man, she runs out to the store, stocks up on groceries, and everything else when her son is on his way home. At first it bothered me, I thought she was trying to make him think I wasn't a good wife because I didn't have the stuff done, or that I wasn't taking good enough care of him, but it wasn't about me at all. It was about the mother and her son.

Thankfully my husband and his mother have a good relationship, but he has done exactly as a man and a woman for that matter is supposed to do, he has bonded with his wife and family. I used to think that she didn't really accept me as I would have liked for her to, she was slow to embrace me although she's always been respectful. Living together has changed all of that. We are much closer and have really come to know each other and understand each other so much more. The great thing is we share a bond now as well, we both love him, and can share him. Poor guy there is a lot of clucking going on around him. He loves it even though he's usually the type that would rather be left alone.

Sure I could have left all that bit out, but I think I will keep it. My mother in law will be moving out this weekend. Her house will become available this week. I'm honestly going to miss having her around everyday. I've enjoyed having her here. She's helped so much with cleaning, and she even does my laundry sometimes. How spoiled is that? We've all gotten along quite well.

The cat is insisting that I stop this incessant rattling of keys immediately and pet and hold him. He's finally settled down on the mouse.

Well, this wasn't all that mean was it? See what a little rest can do for a person? Take naps people. It makes the world a better place. Oh and to the Principal of the little school with unisex bathrooms, Clorox wipes. Or something similar. Problem solved. Further, umm, boys, seat up, thems the break, put it down when you are done.

Who Is In The Mood For Some Pie?

Momma Makes A Mean Pie.

Okay, Bold Stuck. This is annoying. Really, I won't stop. Ah, there. I had the most horrible piece of pie at work today, it was some sort of smashed up apple and peach concoction with crumbs on top. The filling was mushy and thick, and all around not good. My mother could definitely teach those people something about making a good pie. She makes wonderful pie, nothing fancy, the crusts aren't super buttery and flaky like the uppity pie places out there, but they are homemade, and taste just right with the sweet and tangy fillings she adds.

It really is simple, she makes and rolls out the crust, slices up apples, mixes them with sugar and something or other else, I know there is cinnamon in there somewhere, and butter, covers it, pokes holes in the top, and yum, good pie. The best really.

Fall is a great time of year for pie. Something about those bright colors on the trees, makes me think of an apple harvest, and a warm slice of fresh apple pie, with spoonfull of vanilla ice cream on top of course. I don't know about other people, but when I grew up we never had a store bought pie.

In many ways I've deprived my own child of that experience. I hardly cook some days, and most certainly don't bake anything. Although we did bake some chocolate chip cookies the other day, I've practically forgot how to bake a thing. Don't worry though, I never force store bought pies on any child. I don't touch them most of the time.

The school sent home a note the other day about some Fall thing, meant to take the place of the evil and scary Halloween celebrations I remember from growing up wild and uncivilized. I guess the kids can dress as a story book character (boring), but noooooo scary monsters or anything that might "offend" (boring). No swords, or light sabers please (boring), and definitely no Chinese stars or boots made for walkin'. I have to give it to them, at least they aren't trying to perpetrate this year and hold the thing on Halloween night, they chose an altogether different night. Of course, the kids will be able to go "trunk or treating" this is where they go from car to car in the school parking lot and get candy (boring). Yawn. Oh are you still awake?

Now, I'm sorry but this does absolutely nothing to reinforce the message that I have drilled into my child's head for the last 10 years of her life, "don't take candy from strangers in cars," among many other notions.

Excuse me, for saying so, but how gay. Yeah, uh, we won't be attending that one. Let's pretend we're not celebrating Halloween, and then do it on a different night, hahaha, that's really sticking it to someone. Makes me want to go build a fake cemetery in my yard right now.

Do I just not get it or what? Everyone else seems just as content to sit around and let flipping committees of housewives change everything, including people's holidays. Sure I could have gone to the PTO meeting, but I would rather drive a stake into my skull. These mysterious people run the school, and get pretty darn hostile when other parents assert their own opinions on anything been there, once was enough.

Well, who wants pie? Sounds good to me.

Per Friend's Recommendation

No More Hate Blogging.

She says my blog has been really hateful this week. Perhaps it has, I won't deny I did go a bit overboard on the toe ring thing, but I tell you, make no mistake I am tired of high maintenance snotty blondes. I really am. You would be too if you were me, trust me on that.

I'll try to post something not so hateful soon. Hugs.