You Ask, We Deliver

Get 'Em Here.

My friend is always ordering me around, and demanding I send her kit pics. She's like Peppermint Patty, and I'm the girl with the glasses who follows her around and calls her "sir." She asks, I give. So, my phone is full of kit pics, and here is one of them:

I'm Avoiding Responsibility

There I've Confessed.

It's my Friday, which doesn't really mean a thing because it is nobody else's Friday therefore I still have to do all the other stuff I don't do when it's only my Monday or Tuesday. I could be studying, picking up the house, or watching dish water evaporate, but no, I choose to be here, with you. Because in truth I really do like you.

So while I'm here avoiding doing anything that requires lifting more than a finger on a keyboard I might as well put something down to read. Mr. Conner my cat doesn't really fancy the idea at all, he would rather I pet him and give him some attention. Lately he's been doing this really cute thing where he lays in my arms just like a little baby, and he purrs, oh the purring, it is darn near hypnotic.

I'm sure it is absolutely rivetting to hear all about my cat, but it does give my fingers something to do while I try to retrieve the actual ideas that were swirling around in my head so prominently throughout the week. It has become a real problem for me actually, I have such a difficult time retaining an idea for a convenient time to write about it. I've been struggling with it for a while, my memory that is, and have yet to figure out why I can't hold a thought any longer than say your average houseplant. I've always been very sure and confident about my memory, I can recall things in vivid detail from many many years ago, but I'm at a loss when I try to remember what thought was so clear just yesterday.

It probably doesn't help much to be very preoccupied with a great many other things at the same time. Everything just becomes all jumbled in there. I am doing all right with my class however, which does bring a bit of relief. Although, the last 2 chapters really racked my brains and had me rethinking my plans for world domination, oops, I mean, getting a degree.

I hate that dull fog that comes over my mind sometimes. I've always thought, probably foolishly, that my mind was one of my better assets, which has sometimes led me to think I'm smarter than I actually am. That is a bit disappointing to me, but what is always needed in a situation like that is just a little humbling, and I'm getting that with chapters 7 and 8.

It doesn't help that I've already set it in my mind that anything less than an "A" in my class means I am a complete and total failure. Heh. Just kidding, but I would like to earn an "A" if at all possible. There is this constant conversation playing out in my mind where I question everything and anything I ever planned on doing. This is the part where I start worrying that I worry too much. Imagine that type of burden, worrying about worrying, that's usually when I just throw my hands up in the air and say to hell with it all, I'm a neurotic flake.

Now after all of that, will you believe me if I say, I'm actually pretty happy about my life? I'm all right. Tomorrow is another day, I have God, I have life, I have love, I have family, the rest is just details. So what if I've got the short term memory of a banana peel. I'm going to bed early tonight, I've got a lot of catching up to do, and I think I have a test tomorrow, which means I can't miss class to take my kiddo trick or treating. I'll figure something out.

Not Quite Accurate, But The First Sentence

At Least It Is A New Post.

You Are a "Don't Tread On Me" Libertarian

You distrust the government, are fiercely independent, and don't belong in either party. Religion and politics should never mix, in your opinion... and you feel opressed by both. You don't want the government to cramp your self made style. Or anyone else's for that matter. You're proud to say that you're pro-choice on absolutely everything!

What's Your Political Persuasion?

Link found at Miriam's Ideas

Good Morning

Ranting Raving Lunatics Unite Here

What does That Say For The Rest Of The Thing?

Well. Oh shoot this bold thingy is stuck again. I tell you, it can be tricky using the computer. One thing that hasn't been tricky is the class that I'm taking. To date I have aced all 3 of my exams. Not too shabby for a chick who last went to college in the early 90's. I just might actually get through the class and raise the dilapidated and neglected grade point average that I abandoned 13 years ago when this extremely hot, handsome and charming Marine swept me off my feet and made me his kept woman.

The man has been keeping me very well ever since. Hush now, I know you want to hear more about the hot and steamy handsome Marine man I married, but that's not what I'm here to talk about. Just know that although there have been some bumpy times, it pretty much has been a marriage made in heaven. He's not a Marine anymore, but he's still as handsome as ever, I guess some would say once a Marine, always a Marine, but you know what I'm saying don't you?
I better stop, it sounds like I'm bragging. If there is anything I've learned lately is to stop taking things for granted and thinking everything is going just perfectly. Besides nobody likes bragging, including me. I hate it really.

Recently I've been asking, just what exactly has feminism done for me lately? Huh? Answer that one. I mean really, my sister and I sat at the kitchen table last night and tried to come up with the answer to this very important question. Do you feel duped? Do you feel like you have it all? Really, I feel like I've got to work full-time, parent full-time, and do as much housework as women have always done since the dawn of modern appliances. I feel like I'm doing it all, and doing it all half assed.

I'm not the queen of my domain, keeper of the home, maker of the peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with the crusts neatly trimmed off. No, I'm the rushing around, putting it off for later, constantly cleaning, doing laundry, working, hair combing, hoping everything comes together just right one. I'm the one who sends extra money so the kiddo can eat breakfast at school because we are too tired to get up that much earlier to make it, besides, I don't have time, I have to get myself ready to go to work so that I can be an equal earner. Is this the part where I'm supposed to be glad that I can go out and work just as hard as a man, and try to raise a child at the same time?

Is it so wrong that I would rather be home with my child? Even though she is already 11 years old, I still see that she needs me as much today as ever. What obligation do men feel in all of this? Men don't feel obliged to support the family alone, they expect their wives to get out there and work just as hard as they do, they have been told over and over that women want to do this, that women will do this. My husband comes home to a messy house, uncooked food, and empty pantry. Who has time for grocery shopping? Noodles again. Oh wait, I've got this jar of spaghetti sauce we can throw it on these egg noodles, sprinkle some parmesean cheese on, voila, dinner is served. He doesn't say it, but I'm sure he remembers that his mother always had a meal on the table, but she was a stay at home mom, I am not a housewife.

Sure, I could just give up this absurd notion of going to school, but I have at most 10 more years in my profession before either my arms fall off or my back gives out. Not to mention I don't fancy the notion of being a 60 year old massage therapist trying to work until retirement. When my body starts hurting, which is quite often these days, I find it more and more difficult to picture myself doing this the rest of my life. I have no idea what working day in and day out in a darkened room will do for my eyes, but the term "mole people" has crossed my mind, although in reality I think it is probably better for my eyes than staring at a computer screen all day.

Leaving my field altogether is something that I am not ready to do yet, but perhaps going to school will help make that feel more comfortable to me. I truly feel at peace with my work. I don't know if I will be able to keep pace and multi-task and do all of those fancy busy things other people do at work, I'm used to quiet, peace, beautiful music, snoring people, the smell of lavender. Oh in due time I suppose, things will balance out.

And that my dears is the great thing about being a citizen of the U.S. of A. We can do something different, we can change careers, go back to school, start over. It is very American to be able to decide at 36 years old, hey, I think I will do something else. Other people in the world do not have that flexibility, you are what you are, and it is a ridiculous notion to think of trying to change that, heck in Japan, if you aren't up to muster in the 9th grade, there is no reason to even go on to high school, let alone college.

Funny I chose a career where I pamper and care for people at work, when what I would have been happy to do was stay home and do the same for my family. In fact, making people feel good is the best part of my job. What I have in mind will be a bit different than what I'm used to, but I'm hoping that by choosing a degree that is in high demand, I may find it easier to get out there even if I'm not a perky 24 year old.

Yeah Yeah Yeah, I've got it all planned now. We'll see. We shall see.

P.S. Don't worry, I'm not going to school for writing, the world has more than enough pontificating "bloviators". Heh.

My Tenets Of Being Conservative

It Isn't Commie For Starters.

As always Francis Porretto provokes thought, and inspires comment. His post on how even conservatives smear themselves really made me ask the question of myself, what do I picture a conservative to be, or how should one act? I came up with a list in my head last night of things that I associate with being politically conservative, sure there are few politicians who represent these that I know of, but I guess there is always hope. The left would more than happily portray conservatives as rigid, unchanging, uptight religious zealots, living in trailer parks, shooting at squirrels, but I don't see it that way.

Even among people who describe themselves politically as conservatives, there are those who I find rather repugnant, some I find ridiculous in their snobbery, and even worse, they make me want to disassociate myself from them. The internet has been wonderful for conservatives, although sometimes I find myself embarrassed of some of the stuff people put out there.

I am a conservative:

1. I believe if someone attacks our country, it should not be a question of whether we retaliate or not, but WHEN will we retaliate.

2. I believe people who move here should learn our language, integrate our culture, and embrace our values, or leave. That includes people who were born here.

3. I believe the government would be terrible at the administration of health care, and that we should keep it private. I literally tremble with fear at the idea that someday one of these bozos might actually get that stuff through the government, and toss it on us.

4. I support the police department, however, I revoke support of the police when they start treating law abiding citizens like criminals, or they are used to generate revenue for the state from law abiding citizens in the form of sting operations/set ups and cameras on street lights.

5. I reject the rape of the bank accounts of the producing, working people of this country that is currently enforced by the government.

6. I reject the notion that I somehow owe a portion of my earnings to people that have children they can't afford, or people who do not work period.

7. I believe at least half of all government employees should be fired and made to get real jobs in the private sector.

8. I despise bureaucrats.

9. I believe the U.N. is corrupt, useless, and we should remove membership in the body altogether.

10. I don't believe we should ever grant citizenship to anyone who forces entry into our country illegally and sets up house. Anyone doing so should most certainly not be the recipient of any government hand out program such as food stamps and health care. The fact that the bureaucrats have deemed it appropriate to pay the hospital bills of illegal aliens while milking the paychecks of tax paying citizens shows just exactly how useless our government has become.

11. I believe the biggest communist threat to this country is the political left, who would gladly crawl into bed with the likes of Fidel Castro.

12. I believe in the right to bear arms, and that it is absolutely necessary in this day and age to protect that right, whether I actually own a gun or not.

13. I still believe the U.S. is the leader of the free world, and that this is the best country to be in, but we are not doing a good job of protecting our own inalienable rights.

14. I believe in protecting and preserving natural beauty in places like Yellowstone. I believe in conserving resources and wasting as little as possible, but realize that we might have to use some of our own resources as well. I do think a balance could be struck if extremists were not involved.

15. I believe everything is polarized politically, and I've never seen so many people dig their heels in the way they do these days. I also think people have become extremely hateful about their views, and I suppose I'm guilty of that as well.

I think that is enough for one day.

Where To Begin

Stuck At Home.

Everyone has cleared out so it is just the kiddo and I tonight, although my brother may show up later. And yes, I am pretty much stuck at home relying on the generosity of others this week. Sure a ride is only a phone call away, but the convenience of getting in the car and going whenever I please is just not available at the moment. Which makes it almost impossible to comprehend that in some places like say, New York City, some people don't even own cars of their own.

I've never been there but I suppose that things are pretty conveniently located then, they must be, but out here things are spread out. Sure we have a city bus system here, and forgive me for saying so, I wouldn't if it weren't true, but a lot of the bus passengers I've encountered were rather frightening people. Now now, hear me out. I hate snobbery as much as anyone else, I promise I'm not being a snob here, but I cannot deny that there have been times I've actually been scared of some of the people I've encountered on the bus. The most disarming part of any bus travel here is the inevitable stop at the main bus station.

Now I don't know if it is just our town, but for some reason there are a lot of people congregating at the bus station who have switchy eyes, have not bathed in while, and are apt to carry on conversations with themselves. Not only that, but it was at our very bus station that my best friend and I saw for the first time in our life a man with extremely large boobs, we were just 13 years old, and it was quite troubling to us at the time. We honestly did not know what to make of the situation. Add to all of the aforementioned a seedy element, and some angry looking youths, and well, anyone can see why some people would rather drive themselves to their intended location. I'm not going to lie, the bus felt dirty, and there were people who smelled bad on it.

In fact, the last time I rode the bus I was 18 years old and had pissed off my parents to the point that they took my car away and I had to get a bus pass. Dad took pity on me after a month of bus riding and finally gave the car back. I never screwed up like that again. It was not a time I remember fondly at all. That's it. Unless I bum a ride from someone, my only option is the bus, and that is why I will pretty much be homebound until hubby gets home again. It is not just the bus passengers that make bus riding so unappealing, the bus system itself takes literally hours off the lives of unsuspecting travellers as well, it takes forever to get anywhere. Mind you I'm not feeling sorry for myself, I'm just relaying the very unimportant facts of my life at the moment. It's pretty much what I do here, and why only about .00001 percent or less of the population of the U.S. reads this stuff, but I do thank you both for stopping by.

Quick Post

No Time For This Bit Here.

Been slaving away with hubby cleaning out the garage. It was bonding over boxes. It looks so much better. I have to study, actually, finish a "comprehensive" problem that is due on Tuesday. Hubby will be taking my beautiful new car to work this week, it is the best solution to our little problem of his car being all smashed up and all. I'm pretty much on a mini vacation right now so, I'll be hanging at home, which means I will more than likely have more than enough time to write about all sorts of things like, why some women like to stalk me, what falling off the wagon really means, and how altogether blessed we are as a family.

Sure some people might not think totalling two cars in less than a year means one is blessed, but we don't agree, at least we had the cars, and walked away. This would be a good time for a smelly old Corsica update. I would like to report that the Corsica and its new owners are getting along wonderfully. In fact, the last time I saw her, the lady we gave it to that is, she told me if it weren't for that Corsica, she would not have been able to go to her father's funeral out of state. Of course I think they were lucky the car made such a journey, but I tell you those things make up in dependability what they lack in appearance.

Just go to any town in America, and I guarantee one will find at least one fully operational Corsica that was made in 1990 or so. Sure most of them have at least one door that is a completely different color from the rest of the car, and there is always the common polka dot pattern of paint chipping on the hood, not to mention the strange shredded appearance the back seat seems to take on, but the thing will be running. Ugly or not, smelly or not people are still driving those things. Frankly, I get rather excited when I see one running. Every once in a while I see a fine specimen with barely any of the above, and it is quite a wonder to behold.

Of course the self conscious Corsica drivers don't quite understand my staring in admiration, but being the friendly sorts that usually drive Corsicas they don't take my gawking too seriously. Perhaps I was a little too zealous in my desire to give the Corsica away. Heck, she's running still, and I'm toying with having to rent a car eventually if the insurance company doesn't get a move on. My husband and I are sticking to our resolve that we are not going to worry, we are just going to deal with things as they come.

Given my history of worrying about anything and everything it has been tempting to go to there, to the comfortable fretting place that I usually exist in, but I'm just not going to allow myself that. I'm going to have faith. I'm going to be grateful and thankful for what I have right at this very moment. There is still a Corsica driver in me, and for goodness sakes if I ever learned anything it is, Corsica drivers DO NOT Worry. Period.

It Is Good To Be Alive

Sometimes You Just Have To Say It.

Well, we don't know what is going to happen to hubby's completely smashed up little Jeep Liberty, but I will tell you this much, I would say it was a good car given my husband and his passenger walked away from their tumble, one and a half times, with some scratches and some achy muscles. Of course, my husband may be in more pain than he's let on, he's one of those tough guys who suffers silently. Whaling like a banshee is more my style, he's more dignified about things.

We both know what could have happened. What we could have lost. Neither of us can say it out loud so much, but we both know. His car landed about 10 feet from a ravine. We can imagine what a difference that 10 feet could have made.

The connection that normally exists between us has intensified. Being reminded how easily things can change usually has that effect on people I would guess. I love that man, I thank God right here and now that my loving husband is still with us. We've been doing a lot of hugging lately.

We don't know what the outcome will be with insurance and the car or any of that. We don't even know how he is going to get to work next week. He may take my car, then I will need transportation. Sure, these are things to worry about, but they do seem small in the overall scheme of things. It will all work itself out eventually I suppose. We'll figure something out.

Dude

My Fears Have Been Realized.

Let me preface this with saying that while living in Japan I became comfortable with using the Japanese potty, but there was a part of me that always wondered what a sight it would be if the door accidentally opened while I was in that precarious position.

Well, here you go:

I Promise

To Post Soon.

My my. I tell you, if I wasn't about to pass out into a deep sleep I would take more time to write something completely unimportant for you all to read. However, I have only had about 4 hours sleep in the last day and a half or something, I can't even think clearly, and today I actually do have something important to say:

Let me just put it this way, he is all right, thank the Lord in Heaven above. Last night hubby rolled his car on a cold lonely Wyoming highway. I left at 2:00a.m. to pick him up in Laramie Wyoming. It was a tough drive, the weather was nasty, and I just wanted to get to him as fast as possible to see for myself that he was really okay, plus I was scared that I might end up in a ditch myself with the road conditions.

Anyway, I will write more later. Just wanted to check in, honestly, it has been a hell week for me. Oh and I had a test today in my class, I'm quite anxious to see how well I did on that, I was pretty dazed by the time I went to take it. I guess we will be in the market for a new car.

Back soon.

Yum

+


Pie.

My Lovely daughter took the pictures.

Proof

My Pets Are Bums.

Sometimes The Title Is The Hardest Part

Then There Is This Bit Here.

Hello friends, this is me. I'm even in a good mood tonight. It was probably that 2 hour nap I took today, but I don't even feel like writing mean things at all. Although, I don't usually plan all that much what I'm going to write, I normally just sit down and start writing so I can't promise for sure. I have no more idea than you do where this post is going. It's kind of exciting isn't it? Well, isn't it?

I probably shouldn't write about the little news tidbit I heard on the radio today about how some Principal at a school in Norway has declared that the boy students are forever more required to sit down to relieve themselves. To PEE, she wants them to sit down to pee. Now, of course I have no personal or invested (hahaha, I think that should say vested instead of invested, I'm leaving it because I think it is funny and humbling) interest in whether a boy, or even a grown man finds it more comfortable to sit down to pee or what have you, but immediately, my son, the one I never had, popped into my head and my first reaction was, "Oh no no, there is no way a school is going to say that my son has to sit down to pee, standing up to pee is part of being a man gosh dang it, and the reason men like camping outdoors much more than most women it is a right, or should be declared one if necessary."

My sister and I have reached the conclusion that mothers and their sons have a special bond that those of us who are mothers of daughters alone cannot understand, however I can verify that I have witnessed this mothers and their sons thing on various occasions, it is as true as I sit here, some mothers favor their sons more, even over their own daughters as well. That is not to say that they would not protect their daughter, but I've noticed that some women really go overboard for their boys.

It can be quite annoying, especially to my sister who has to deal with the mothers of 40 year old sons which call her to try and get things done on behalf of their obviously spoiled and inept grown sons. Really, she deals with these mothers all the time. She notes that she rarely if ever has mothers calling for the same reasons for their grown daughters.

Hey, I live with it. As much as I love my mother in law, she changes when my husband comes home for his week off. She's suddenly up cooking and cleaning, and doing all sorts of things that she doesn't necessarily feel the urgency to do when it is just us here. Man, she runs out to the store, stocks up on groceries, and everything else when her son is on his way home. At first it bothered me, I thought she was trying to make him think I wasn't a good wife because I didn't have the stuff done, or that I wasn't taking good enough care of him, but it wasn't about me at all. It was about the mother and her son.

Thankfully my husband and his mother have a good relationship, but he has done exactly as a man and a woman for that matter is supposed to do, he has bonded with his wife and family. I used to think that she didn't really accept me as I would have liked for her to, she was slow to embrace me although she's always been respectful. Living together has changed all of that. We are much closer and have really come to know each other and understand each other so much more. The great thing is we share a bond now as well, we both love him, and can share him. Poor guy there is a lot of clucking going on around him. He loves it even though he's usually the type that would rather be left alone.

Sure I could have left all that bit out, but I think I will keep it. My mother in law will be moving out this weekend. Her house will become available this week. I'm honestly going to miss having her around everyday. I've enjoyed having her here. She's helped so much with cleaning, and she even does my laundry sometimes. How spoiled is that? We've all gotten along quite well.

The cat is insisting that I stop this incessant rattling of keys immediately and pet and hold him. He's finally settled down on the mouse.

Well, this wasn't all that mean was it? See what a little rest can do for a person? Take naps people. It makes the world a better place. Oh and to the Principal of the little school with unisex bathrooms, Clorox wipes. Or something similar. Problem solved. Further, umm, boys, seat up, thems the break, put it down when you are done.

Who Is In The Mood For Some Pie?

Momma Makes A Mean Pie.

Okay, Bold Stuck. This is annoying. Really, I won't stop. Ah, there. I had the most horrible piece of pie at work today, it was some sort of smashed up apple and peach concoction with crumbs on top. The filling was mushy and thick, and all around not good. My mother could definitely teach those people something about making a good pie. She makes wonderful pie, nothing fancy, the crusts aren't super buttery and flaky like the uppity pie places out there, but they are homemade, and taste just right with the sweet and tangy fillings she adds.

It really is simple, she makes and rolls out the crust, slices up apples, mixes them with sugar and something or other else, I know there is cinnamon in there somewhere, and butter, covers it, pokes holes in the top, and yum, good pie. The best really.

Fall is a great time of year for pie. Something about those bright colors on the trees, makes me think of an apple harvest, and a warm slice of fresh apple pie, with spoonfull of vanilla ice cream on top of course. I don't know about other people, but when I grew up we never had a store bought pie.

In many ways I've deprived my own child of that experience. I hardly cook some days, and most certainly don't bake anything. Although we did bake some chocolate chip cookies the other day, I've practically forgot how to bake a thing. Don't worry though, I never force store bought pies on any child. I don't touch them most of the time.

The school sent home a note the other day about some Fall thing, meant to take the place of the evil and scary Halloween celebrations I remember from growing up wild and uncivilized. I guess the kids can dress as a story book character (boring), but noooooo scary monsters or anything that might "offend" (boring). No swords, or light sabers please (boring), and definitely no Chinese stars or boots made for walkin'. I have to give it to them, at least they aren't trying to perpetrate this year and hold the thing on Halloween night, they chose an altogether different night. Of course, the kids will be able to go "trunk or treating" this is where they go from car to car in the school parking lot and get candy (boring). Yawn. Oh are you still awake?

Now, I'm sorry but this does absolutely nothing to reinforce the message that I have drilled into my child's head for the last 10 years of her life, "don't take candy from strangers in cars," among many other notions.

Excuse me, for saying so, but how gay. Yeah, uh, we won't be attending that one. Let's pretend we're not celebrating Halloween, and then do it on a different night, hahaha, that's really sticking it to someone. Makes me want to go build a fake cemetery in my yard right now.

Do I just not get it or what? Everyone else seems just as content to sit around and let flipping committees of housewives change everything, including people's holidays. Sure I could have gone to the PTO meeting, but I would rather drive a stake into my skull. These mysterious people run the school, and get pretty darn hostile when other parents assert their own opinions on anything been there, once was enough.

Well, who wants pie? Sounds good to me.

Per Friend's Recommendation

No More Hate Blogging.

She says my blog has been really hateful this week. Perhaps it has, I won't deny I did go a bit overboard on the toe ring thing, but I tell you, make no mistake I am tired of high maintenance snotty blondes. I really am. You would be too if you were me, trust me on that.

I'll try to post something not so hateful soon. Hugs.