Underwear Chewer Extraordinaire

What Is It With The Underpants?

Don't answer that. I think we all know, and we don't need to say a word about it. These things should never be spoken about, only contemplated silently. I'm a little concerned about my baby's uncanny knack to find pre-worn underwears--we won't say dirty as that is a little harsh--and drag them out into the living room. Just a side note, from here on out we will be referring to the puppy as "the baby" please allow me this eccentricity, (I think that is a word, if not it is now) and go along with this strange request, all righty? Thanks. I'm only drinking sweet tea here folks. Just tea.

Anyway, it is a little embarrassing when the whole family, including the extended family, is sitting around watching movies on the huge couch, and the baby comes barreling down the stairs with a freshly worn pair of under pants on his head. Ah hahaha it's so funny, unless it's your underwear the baby is dragging around and trying to kill by shaking them violently back and forth while he clenches them with all of his might with his tiny razor sharp baby teeth. For privacy sake we will not say exactly whose underwear were on display, but lets just say that her sister of course had to remind her of the time that she (the sister) tacked all of her underwear to the ceiling in her room while she was away at a slumber party.

Not only did she do that, but this prankster sister also stuck a gigantic maxi pad in this same innocent person's back pack hoping that it would fall out at the slumber party and embarrass the poor girl half to death. It was the age you see. This same sister laughed her butt off when the poor girl told her she found the maxi pad and was so embarrassed that she threw it behind her friend's washing machine just so the other girls would not see it, and only confessed to the friend years later when getting a period wasn't such an embarrassing fact of life, and she and the friend laughed their asses off about it later.

So, of course the sister of the person whose underwear was being dragged around shamelessly by the baby found it quite amusing because that is how she is. The husband of this person just put his hand over his mouth and tried not to laugh. He is always fussing and saying that this person leaves her undies laying around, which is completely not true, but he keeps saying it. He is only saying it because she made fun of him one time because she noticed that the cats keep dragging his boxer briefs into the cat box, along with his socks.

The baby has amassed quite a pile of various household items to include undies, stuffed animals, stray socks, leashes, and the real chew toys. His favorite by far is this monster. He likes to get the monster and kill it. It has eyes that rattle so I think it makes it seem more like the monster is fighting back. He really likes the monster, and underwear, but we don't talk about that.