The Obvious Aside.
I consider myself fortunate that having gone through the public education system in the 70's and 80's, I actually came out of it able to read, write, and even balance my check book. I may not be the brightest or most well read person around, but I could be if I chose to spend my spare time that way. I just want the same for my own child. I want to leave this world knowing that she can stand on her own two feet and survive. That is obvious, that is what any loving parent wants for their children.
We gave them 7 years of her education. Seven years. Now, I am going to do what I should have done a long time ago, I am going to take responsibility for her educational milestones. I realized something one day when I was reading a post at Mrs. du Toit's website. A snippet:
"Unless your child is handicapped, your child will learn to do all of the following, by the time they are 18 years old:
Talk
Write
Read
Use the potty and wipe effectively
Sleep through the night
Tie their own shoes
Skip
Throw/catch a ball
Use a spoon/fork/knife
Fix themselves a bowl of Cheerios
Say please and thank you
Not scream and cry in the middle of a movie
Not bite their brother"
I'm sorry, the block quote thing just doesn't work for me. Anyway, I highlighted her words. Now, I had already made the decision to home school our darling, but these words, this simple little list, has given me even more confidence in my decision. I realized that our daughter has reached, and overcome every developmental milestone put in front of her, except in the area of her education. Her education is the one area in which I let other people take responsibility. I trusted and assumed that they would do this job. I was foolish and wrong.
Sure, I tried to work with her when she got home from school. She was totally unresponsive, and down right frustrated by the time she got home. She did nothing but cry if I pressed her to do more work. I thought it was my fault, that somehow I wasn't approaching her in the right way, that I must be doing something wrong. It was my fault.
The teachers were more than happy to tell me that I just didn't read to her enough, I didn't work with her enough, that it was my fault. Well, I can't blame them now. I should have done more. I should have taken control of the situation. I thought I couldn't do it, that I wasn't disciplined enough, that I would fail. My worst fear was that I would fail her, but now I realize that letting other people take responsibility was the biggest mistake I could make. I love my kid, they don't. It is that simple.
There were 30 children in her kindergarten class. The same class that I was told, "we want the children reading ready when they enter kindergarten, and reading by the time they leave. We would prefer they were already reading when they got here." Well, my kid wasn't reading, or even reading ready when she got there. She was ready to learn how to cut and paste, write her name, find her same chair every day, follow instructions, keep her hands to herself, and learn the alphabet, but reading, no, she just simply was not ready for that.
Well, here we are. I have to take her out now. We cannot continue this way. She would suffer enormously if I were to let her enter 6th grade at her current levels. The work would be completely out of her scope, and she would sit there completely confused with the tasks she would be asked to perform. It would completely waste her time. Not only would she think she is stupid, which she is not, the other kids would continue to tell her how stupid she is, which she is not, and nothing good would come of it.
I don't know how much time I will have for the frivolous act of blogging once we start school in the fall. I am more than willing to give up my little hobby in order to give that time to her education. I hope to be able to juggle all of these things with finesse. It could happen. We have a curriculum we are going to use, I'm not creative enough to come up with one on my own. I want the structure of a step by step process to follow.
We are both getting excited about it. She can't wait for me to order the books. I can't wait either. I am hoping to get that done this week. I don't plan to start her school until September, then we go from there. Wish us luck, and if you think of it, throw in a prayer for our guidance, and for help for us.
It is a huge decision, I know. But you'll do fine and she'll do fine.
ReplyDeleteKeep one thing in mind, but not anything that should change your decision: They lie.
They probably won't see it as lying, but "full truth" is necessary in order to not be lying.
Other kids are not up to the standards either. That's the part they are not telling you. They are telling you she is not at "the standard" but that is a fixed benchmark, having nothing to do with how badly other kids are doing, too.
They do this with boys a lot. They'll get parents to fret over the fact that their handwriting isn't up to standard, and they'll show writing samples to prove it.
What they fail to say, however, is that the writing samples they are comparing to are from girls. Girls develop their small motor skills first, so handwriting is easier for them. If they pulled out handwriting samples from the other boys in the class, the parents could see that their boy, the one they've been told is behind and not up to standard, is writing just like the other boys in his class.
I tried to tell my daughter, you are not the only one having trouble. I said, they just don't tell you about all of the other kids having trouble.
ReplyDeleteShe feels like she is the only one. I've sat in the class rooms, they are a mess. Children move around in small groups all day long, it is much like kindergarten. The stronger students do all of the work, the weaker ones just copy the others, but they don't know what they are doing at all.
I swear kids learn by accident in these schools. They learn in spite of the teaching methods being used.
I finally realized that the way they get around the testing, and no child left behind is to declare all of the struggling students as learning disabled, that way they can be assisted on the standardized tests, and no one is held accountable.
I applaud your decision to take control of your daughters education and home school!
ReplyDeleteIf more parents really cared about their childrens education, they would be doing the same thing. Unfortunately most folks have bought into the lie that the government indoctrination centers (public schools) can do a better job than the parents themselves!
BTW, I have added you to my blog roll.
Thank you, it is a huge change for us, but we are going to give it our all. We are getting pretty excited about it now.
ReplyDeleteThank you for the link. :)