Saturday, September 22, 2007

My Neighbor Might Have Found My Blog

Or Cuckoo For Coco Puffs.

Someone doing a search on ''barking dogs property value" showed up. She left the following comment on this post:

"Morrigan is so right - dogs belong in the country where they can run. Keeping a dog on a city or suburban lot is cruel and just plain selfish. Have you ever seen your dog run at truly full speed? I am not talking about scampering around the yard. They need about a football-field-size space to adequately exercise. Taking them on a leash when you're jogging is woefully inadequate - it's only one step above shackles and chains. (End of soapbox rant.)"--Angela

Firstly, she quite misinterpreted Morrigan's comment. I also took this Angela person's comment as a sort of cheap pot shot at me, and pretty much anyone who has dogs that doesn't live in the country. Apparently, I am cruel and just plain selfish because my poor lazy dogs don't have the opportunity to run free in the country. Let me clear up one thing first, I don't JOG, all right. Suggesting that I take my dogs on a leash while I jog is just passive aggressive. Angela is probably some skinny celery eating SUBARU driver.

Why yes I have seen my dog run at full speed, WHEN I took them to the "football-field-sized-space" a block from my house. Amazing huh? Who woulda thunk us city folkses had big ole lumps o' dert big enuff fer our critters to run out in the open huh?

Oh Angela, thank you for the rant, and the lecture. I'm sure all of the hundreds of millions of dog owners that don't live in the country thank you as well. We appreciate Subaru drivers who can point out our faults and set us straight. We're just selfish city dwellers after all.

I am sure you make a great neighbor by the way. I've got some really good ones like you too. What would the world be without people like you? I'm sure dogs would be a lot happier if we just opened up the doors and said, "Go Be Free, Stretch Your Legs Dog, No More Bondage For You Slaves to Beggin' Strips, No More Couch Sleeping!" Get out there you poor tortured creatures, throw off your collars and your shackles and run, run, run.

This reminds me of a story my dad used to tell when we were kids. He would say, "Do you know about the agreement that man made with the dogs and cats in the cave?" I would say "No, what?" And he would say, "Way back in the earliest days man made a pact with the dogs and the cats."

"The Dogs agreed to help man watch over his cave, and in exchange man agreed that he would give the dogs meat and bones. The cats agreed that they would keep the cave free of vermin, and in exchange man would give the cat meat to eat."

"And to this day, the dogs and cats and man have kept their agreement, and over time the cats and the dogs have become pets, and man their care taker, but the dogs still help guard the cave, and the cats still keep the cave free of vermin, and man still feeds the dogs and cats, it is quite a wonderful arrangement."

I always loved my dad's way of telling this so much better. I tried to tell it as close to how he did, but he did it so much better.

There, I took a negative and turned it into a positive.


3 comments:

  1. Anonymous6:57 AM

    I truly love it when someone takes another's words out of context.
    As you stated I never said that only people who live in the country should have dogs.
    One of the best things about living in the country is you don't have neighbors, at least not any close enough to stick their nose in your business.

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  2. Yes, I knew immediately you had said nothing of the sort. She seemed to have taken a lot of stuff out of context really.

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  3. Anonymous6:51 PM

    I suppose she thinks it's much more humane to have all those poor dogs rounded up and stuck in cages at the animal shelter? Without the aid of the horribly, selfish city folk, millions more of them would die. But, hey, she knows best, right?

    Stupid bi....er....bint. I don't know if I am allowed to cuss on your blog so I'll stick with bint while thinking of another name.

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